Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Put a hump in your stomach and squeeze in your rump

OK...I know I have grossly neglected this blog since August, but, OH (holding forehead in a graceful Southern belle manner), what challenges and obstacles I have faced. Shall I share?

Sure. As I sit here at 31 weeks, and a baby's noggin rustling against my ribs (uh, yeah, I can feel it in the most pronouned way), I am having difficulty typing with my right hand b/c my baby is conspicuously moving my arm with every movement. Since August, my belly has doubled in size, gained 7 lbs. (amazing!), and people are just realizing that I'm pregnant and I'm about to drop this load in a few weeks. I think I have pulled off the greatest secret reveal without revealing anything!! Just call me Moodini...

Anywho, the hub and I found out we were having a bouncing baby girl back in September. She will be dubbed Audrey Pearl of the Griggs Clan, so Lil Bug turned into Ladybug, and gathered a few other nicknames from family: Bug Ann (my Aunt), Lil Henrietta (my Aunt, again - what's up with her), Noodle (me, after feeling like she was all up in my guts), Oddie (me again - just a play on Audrey)...so who knows who she will be called when it's all said and done. When I look back at the roster of all my nicknames (Mookie, Macadamia Nut, Moo Cow, Mackie, Hell Mel) as well as my siblings (Sunshine, Funky London*, Pup, Puppy Dog, Diver Dan, Booter) and parents (Blind Melon Jelly, Bull, Wompy Cat), I can't help but to think that my new little person is about to be heralded into a time honored tradition of mis-naming. And we will love her just as she is (I watched Bridget Jones this weekend).

*As a sidebar, not this kind of Funky London

What else?
  • I hated my doctor but then grew to like her after a succession of awkward appointments.
  • I had to get an amniocentesis when they believed my Noodle had Trisomy 18 (very scary shit).
  • I had to stand flat footed with my director who clearly isn't ready to deal with a professional and outspoken woman...the details are too numerous to account here, but let's just say I came out victorious.
  • I managed to work my ass off and still was able to come to work 97% of the time despite the usual accoutrements of pregnancy.
  • I managed to put a registry together, which I am not sure if people will honor. I never really got registries b/c people never give you what you "want" on them. And originally, I put together a book registry for my babe but was met with resistance...humans are odd pieces of work.

Cravings Report:

It's all about the Milky Way caramels! So relaxing...

Cocoa Chewy Cookie from Whole Foods Bakery

Pizza - I don't think I've gotten over that one

The Big Salad...think the Seinfeld episode

The third trimester has brought on some very unhealthy snacks, but I still attempt to keep it healthy so I can maintain my womanish Amazonian figure (bump the girlish one).

Other than that, I've been discovering more and more how appalling the world has become. For instance 2 Girls 1 Cup...I won't even provide a link to it, but I will give you a video of folks reactions:

1 comment:

Nik said...

Giiiiiirrrrrrllllllll!!!! That was the funniest things I have ever seen in my life!